Mad About Celebrity

Just when I thought it was safe to watch TV again, along comes Dancing on Ice (I can’t believe I forgot) and the line-up has been revealed. Not sure which is weirder, Heather Mills, ex-wife of ex-Beatle Sir Paul McCartney or GMTV’s Dr Hilary Jones.

We have the usual smattering on unknown Hollyoaks, Emmerdale, Coronation Street and other soap minor ‘celebrities’ plus Olympic swimmer Sharron Davies – she should be good – and she-who-nearly-lost-her-nose Eastenders actress Daniella Westbrook. Holby’s Jeremy Sheffield is set to be this year’s heart throb, while Sinitta is taking to the ice to show she is more than just Simon Cowell’s ex-girlfriend.

Finally we have Bobby Davro who looks a bit long in the tooth compared to all the soap youngsters (sorry Bobby) and Gordon Ramsay’s wife Tana showing that he is not the only star in the family.

It’s an interesting line up of B list celebrities – at this stage no idea who will be the shining stars and who will be out on their bums – literallly.

Dr Hilary Jones

Well of course it is. Last year Tom Chambers won and there were moans from the judges and the purists that others were better and he shouldn’t have won, but the GBP had voted and that was it!

This year it was the same. Only the judges didn’t seem to mind so much. They obviously finally realise that it is an ENTERTAINMENT PROGRAMME and Chris and Ola were the most entertaining. I think there are a few other reasons as well. Chris was tippped to go out in the first few weeks so he had the ‘journey’ which Ricky Whittle didn’t. He was brilliant to start with. Ricky was on an alleged assault charge a couple of weeks ago which probably didn’t improve his popularity with many people. And I don’t think Natalie’s swimsuit outfit did them any favours either. I know Ola wears skimpy costumes but in a different way. I can’t really explain. Maybe she is just sexier.

Anyway that’s it now. Apart from the Christmas special we have no more reality TV to look forward to until Britain’s Got Talent next year.

Chris and Ola

This morning I was watching GMTV before going to work when my son came in the room and declared that Joe would win X Factor on Saturday. No, I said, it would be Olly. He said no chance as Olly had been in the bottom two and Joe hadn’t. Fair enough. So I said that I would bet him the fiver he owes me that Olly would win. We shall see. Neither of us bet on Stacey I’m afraid. Just had a quick look at the bookies and I think that according to them Joe is the favourite and I’m going to be £5 worse off but I’m still confident -ish. It turns out that no-one who has been in the bottom two has EVER gone on to win.

As for Strictly Come Dancing, I confess I haven’t a clue. Any of them could do it, even Chris and Ola who have the popularity vote. Should be an exciting final the following week.

Joe McElderry to win X Factor?

Last night ex-Footballers’ Wives star Laila Rouass and her partner Anton du Beke went out of Strictly Come Dancing after facing the dance off with Ricky Whittle and his partner Natalie Lowe. It was no contest really. Had they faced Chris and Ola they might have stood a tiny chance, but not against Ricky. I thought the judges were unfair to criticize her dancing, particularly Darcey Bussell, who as the newcomer surprised me with her remarks.

With all racist accusations against Anton put firmly behind them, I thought they looked better and better together each time and have given us weeks of entertainment. I am truly sorry to see them go. And I’m not remotely biased because Laila’s cousin is a friend of my son.

Then tonight we had the X Factor quarter final. At last we are left with four people who can actually sing and no longer have to endure the ‘entertainment’ factor of the likes of Jedward – a polite way of saying they just can’t sing. In fact I can sing better with two glasses of wine and a karaoke tape.

When the results were announced and it was clear we were losing Danyl, I have to confess I shed a tear. Only a small one I hasten to add, but a tear nevertheless. He was so gracious in defeat, no shouting or crying or the usual X Factor histrionics. Maybe he knows they’ll be queueing up to give him a recording contract anyway. Lots of runners up have done better than the eventual winners – Leon where are you now? And Steve er what was his name? Michelle McManus – or was that Pop Idol. Hey, what’s the difference. My money’s on Ollie.

Finally. Is this a wind up? Apparently the bella Gino and Stuart ‘Hollyoaks’ Manning have been arrested on animal cruelty charges after killing and eating a rat on the I’m a Celebrity show.

Ch Insp David Oshannessy, from the RSPCA in New South Wales, told BBC Radio 5 live there was a “code of practice” which dictated how animals could be used in theatrical productions and films. The rat murder happened on a day no animals were featuring in the show, so there wasn’t an officer there. He went onto say, “The killing of a rat for a performance is not acceptable. The concern is this was done purely for the cameras.” I suppose eating live insects, squashing them to death in small enclosed spaces and eating kangaroos testicles (well someone killed it first) don’t count.

Danyl and Simon on X Factor

It’s been an interesting weekend on reality TV. Firstly Natalie Cassidy went out of Strictly last night. There were tears and more tears and that was just Vincent. They had ended up in the bottom two with Ricky Whittle and his partner, also called Natalie. The two couples had been dancing the Rock and Roll but the dance, making its first appearance on Strictly, didn’t appear to please the judges or the public. The Charleston, also making its first appearance, faired much better. And the dresses were fabulous! Laila’s dress was gorgeous darling, one to add to my list when they get sold off in some charity sale next year.

Over on the other side, X Factor competition was hotting up. Now down to the final five, with one more due to go tonight, they all sang their little hearts out, hoping for a place in the semi final.

This evening opened with a brilliant rendition of the Scissor Sisters I don’t feel like dancing . When the votes came in and it was down to Lloyd and Ollie, I was holding my breath! When they announced that Ollie was going forward to the semis, I felt really bad for Lloyd, but hey ho, the boy looks good, but I have a friend whose dog Sid sings better when he plays the violin. The friend that is, not the dog…

As for I’ll Be a Celebrity When I Get Out of Here, even my son thinks it’s boring now Katie Price has gone and he can’t stand her! Apparently viewing figures have dropped by 20% since she left the show. Was it her sense of humour? Was it the unbearable pathos of her desperate pleas to Peter to take her back? Was it all that closure rubbish? I’ll bet there’s another couple of reasons more likely.

Lloyd on X Factor

Just when you thought there weren’t enough reality shows on TV (funny yeah), like the buses, three came along at once. First of all we had Strictly Come Dancing which has become more like an episode of Casualty this year and which as you probably guessed by now I love. Then we had the farce which passes for X Factor, judged by Mr Nasty, two fashion victims and a leprechaun and defies belief with some of its remaining acts. And then finally we had I’ll be a celebrity when I get out of here. Trouble with the latter is that the formula is just not funny any more. Too many bugs and nothing new. I actually admire some of the celebs like Kim and George, but when you’ve seen one kangaroo testicle you’ve see them all.

In fact I think my problem with all these shows is the GBP (Great British Public) being given the vote (after all these are the same ‘public’ who voted three times for a Labour Government and look where that’s got us). Strictly at least has the good ones left though Zoe and James should be there. X Factor still has Jedward – need I say more? Even poor little Lloyd may be sweet but he just can’t sing and who voted out Lucie and Jamie? As if the public aren’t bad enough, even the judges have gone completely barking.

As for I’m a Celeb, the pubic voting for Katie every time to do the bushtucker trial is starting to look like bullying again.

I despair. So why am I still watching? Maybe it’s beacuse there’s just nothing else on TV right now apart from Spooks. But I have to say, the real talent was on Thursday night at the BBC Children in Need concert at the Royal Albert Hall. Take That, Robbie Williams, Paolo Nutini, Mika, Leona Lewis, Paul McCartney, Shirley Bassey, the list is endless. It was strictly fantastic!

As if athlete Jade Johnson leaving Strictly Come Dancing after tearing a ligament in her knee wasn’t enough drama for one week – how will she compete in the 2012 Olympics? – Eastenders actor Ricky Groves was booted off after admitting he mucked up his routine. The judges commented that ‘there were just too many mistakes’ and he ‘kept going wrong’. Ricky himself, having been in the dance off three times, was resigned to the fact that it was his turn to go.

How much more drama can we take? Even Laila Rouass, who injured her ankle last week, and had to dance the Waltz with partner Anton du Beke after having had just two days to train, is obviously performing under par. The couple were in the dance off with Ricky, but Laila is obviously the better dancer in spite of her injury.

Hollyoaks actor Ricky Whittle was the highest scorer of the night, but my money is still on Ali and ‘cheesy American’ Brian Fortuna as Craig called him last night on It Takes Two.

Fans of Strictly Come Dancing will have seen 13-year old soul sensation Dionne Bromfield singing her debut single Mama Said on the programme a couple of weeks ago.

Dionne, the god-daughter of singer Amy Winehouse, is a big fan of Yumi and can be seen wearing the Dolly Dress in her video of the single.

Other fans of Uttam and Yumi include Strictly judge Alesha Dixon, Fearne Cotton, Myleene Klass and Amanda Holden.

(Uttam Direct includes Uttam, Yumi, Yumi Girls, Jin-ja and Uttam Kids.)

To help you capture their celebrity style, Uttam have a great offer on this weekend. They are giving away a FREE Yumi bag with EVERY order.

You’ll need to hurry though as the offer closes at midnight on Sunday. Click on the link or banner on the right to visit the site and get your FREE bag with every order.

Any fan of Strictly Come Dancing like me will have seen 13 year old soul sensation Dionne Bromfield singing her debut single Mama Said on the programme a couple of weeks ago. And unless you’ve been hiding somewhere or abroad for the last year, you will know that Dionne is the god-daughter of Amy Winehouse, who has been out of the limelight recently battling her drug addiction.

On Strictly however, Amy returned to TV singing backing vocals for Dionne. Dionne is a big fan of Yumi and can be seen wearing the Dolly Dress in the photograph. She wears this in her video of Mama Said. Click on the link or the Uttam banner right to go direct to the site.

My old ballroom dance teacher once told me that he had met Anton du Beke and that he thought he was a bit dim. Shock horror!

Well Freddie, if you’re listening, you were obviously right. I don’t believe the man was being intentionally racist with his comments. I think, as you said, he is just a bit dim.

Perhaps Max Clifford can help him get out of this. Maybe someone should have advised him (and many others before him including relatives of ex-Prime Ministers and numerous members of the Royal family) when to keep your mouth firmly shut.

Or face the consequences when you put your well-heeled foot in it.

Photograph from Mail Online